Chanting Brook: Black and White Photos

I dropped off my pictures at Printko on Thursday in Wallingford. A beautiful blonde with black-rimmed glasses waited on me. I was real nervous about bringing my film anywhere. I had taken some provocative self-portraits in the shower using a mirror. One hand held the camera while the other covered my johnson. I remembered hearing somewhere that you can’t have any pictures developed that had nudity in them. Now, technically, all the important areas where covered but still, I was pushing the limits. Now, to sacrifice embarrassment of people looking at these photos and snickering or smirking when I came into pick them up, I found out Printko sent the film out to get developed. The best part about it, the developing only took 3 days. Walmart said two weeks.

I handed the role to the beautiful baby with a clearly displayed nametag, Michelle. I then remembered I had spoken to her on the phone the night before when I had called inquiring about developing black and white film. She was soft-spoken, a quality I don’t work well with; I’m practically deaf. I smiled softly at her. I wondered if she would see the pictures. Probably not since the film would be shipped out. She had an extremely cute smile, one with a hint of flirtation. I almost popped wood right there. She had me fill out a form: Name, address, phone number. I couldn’t help but think, well, you have my phone number; can I have yours? What a perfect line. I’ve always found it awkward and completely embarrassing to pick up chicks in public. I just feel like everyone is watching. Not to mention if you get shot down. Also, considering that I would eventually pick up these pictures and potentially face rejection all over again. Not to mention the almost pornographic nature of the pictures I was getting developed. How many snickers and smirks would I get if she shot me down? All of this went through my head in the 30 seconds I spent filling out the form. I decided on the “hand over the form and say nothing” routine. A routine I have become quite accustomed to. She took the form, which was also a pouch for the film and placed the film inside.